H-Texas Magazine » Columns

OVER OUR QUOTE-A

Lynn Ashby — Tue, 15 May 2012 02:21:06 +0000

“Once I rob a bank in Texas. Your government get after me with a whole army. Whole army! One little bank. In Texas, only Texans can rob banks.” – Calvera (played by Eli Wallach) in “The Magnificent Seven”

“No other state commands such fierce pride and loyalty. Lesser mortals are pitied for their misfortune of not being born Texans.” — Queen Elizabeth II, visiting Austin, May 20, 1991, in front of the Texas capitol.

Yes, it’s time once more to look at what people have been saying about us, and what we’re saying about ourselves. So let’s start with something serious: football. “Three things can happen when you throw the ball, and two of them are bad.” – Darrell Royal

“Football is only a game. Spiritual things are eternal. Nevertheless, Beat Texas.” — On a church sign in Arkansas prior to the 1969 UT-Arkansas game.

“I visit Austin, Texas, from time to time to lecture at the University of Texas and fully consider myself a long-distance Longhorns fan. Yes, I know, news of the Red River massacre reached even Somerset, but as an Arsenal (English soccer) supporter, I have been emotionally conditioned for calamity. — Geoffrey Wheatcroft, an English journalist

Speaking of UT: “I was stopped and questioned seven times by University police on my way into the physics building. Seven times. Zero times was I stopped going into the gym – and I went to the gym a lot. That says all you need to know about how welcomed I felt at Texas.” – Former UT professor Neil deGrasse Tyson, celebrity astrophysicist (you see him on TV a lot) and director of New York City’s Hayden Planetarium. He’s black.

“In my mind, I wasn’t going to pay more than $1.2 million.” — Austin businessman Milton Verret who paid $1.8 million for a jacket worn by Michael Jackson in his 1983 video “Thriller.” Verret planned to exhibit the jacket to raise funds for children’s charities.

“If you’ve ever driven across Texas, you know how different one area of the state can be from another. Take El Paso. It looks as much like Dallas as I look like Jack Nicklaus” — Pro Golfer Lee Trevino.

Some people, for reasons which elude me, don’t like us. “How would you feel if Mexico took back Texas?” a British leader in London asked U.S. Ambassador William J. Crowe, Jr., on July 14, 1996, during a discussion on Northern Ireland. Replied the American ambassador: “You’ve asked the wrong man that question. I’m from Oklahoma. We’ve been trying to give Texas back to Mexico for a hundred years.”

“You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.” – George Carlin

Everyone knows, “Houston, we’ve got a problem,” but how about a few more observations on, in and for the Bayou City?

“The view from the Warwick Hotel is the most beautiful I’ve ever seen. It’s just like Paris.”– Bob Hope talking about Houston on The Phil Donahue Show.

“Houston is an example of what can happen when architecture catches a venereal disease.” — Frank Lloyd Wright on Houston’s skyline in the 1950s.

“It is an ugly, sprawling city, unprotected by zoning laws. Block after barren block of weed-infested parking lots and disintegrating houses stand close by upscale shopping centers and lushly landscaped residential Edens like River Oaks. Too many hours are spent in cars on the congested but indispensable freeways. Yet in its way, it is also a city of art and culture, of exciting museums and distinguished buildings and world-class performing arts organizations.” – R.W. Apple, Jr., in The New York Times

“When I was a kid in Houston, we were so poor we couldn’t afford the last two letters, so we called ourselves po’.” – George Foreman

Moving on: “Why doesn’t Texas simply close UT-El Paso?” – Prof. Richard Vedder of Ohio University, commenting on the poor graduation rate at UTEP (one out of 10 graduates in four years, 35 percent in six years)

“Give me an army of West Point graduates and I’ll win a battle. Give me a handful of Texas Aggies and I’ll win the war.” – Gen. George S. Patton may or may not have said this. The Citadel, VMI and other schools claim the quote, too.

Turning to politics: “I have been screamed at by total strangers in the street who recognize me.” – Texas State Sen. Dan Patrick, sponsor of the anti-abortion forced sonogram law.

“We already have term limits. They’re called elections.” – Former Texas House Speaker Rep. Tom Craddick.

“Y’all as tempting as it may be, don’t shoot Obama. We need him to go down in history as the WORST president we’ve EVER had!” — Texas College Republicans called for the resignation of the University of Texas chapter president, Lauren Pierce, who is also the state chapter’s secretary, after she posted this tweet.

. Gov. Rick Perry’s disastrous campaign for the GOP presidential nomination gave us a couple of good quotes. “I am concerned that the unfortunate results of Perry’s performance on the national stage may confirm the stereotype that much of the rest of the country has about Texas – the impression that Texas is a bunch of yahoos and people of low intelligence. “ – Scott Caven, a Houston Republican who was Perry’s state finance chairman in his last two runs for governor. “There has never been a more ineptly orchestrated, just unbelievably subpar campaign for president of the United States than this one.” –A “senior Perry adviser.”

Molly Ivins: “Next time I tell you someone from Texas should not be president of the United States, please pay attention.”

The Grand Slam winner for years to come (cringe, ye Texans) “Oops.” — Our not ready for prime time Texas Gov. Rick Perry in a GOP presidential debate.

Finally, I checked for quotes about Texas in “Bartlett’s Quotations” but found nothing, mainly because there is no such book. Everyone calls it that, but the true name is, “Familiar Quotations” by John Bartlett. You may quote me on that.

Ashby can be quoted at ashby2@comcast.net

FILLED UP OR FED UP?

Lynn Ashby — Tue, 08 May 2012 02:48:46 +0000

THE GAS PUMP – Look at the prices twirl like cherries and red 7s on the face of a Louisiana slot machine. How much are you paying at the pump? Too much, and as economists like to point out, the more we pay for gas the less we have left over for Lotto tickets and a chaw of Red Man.
For us, this price escalation is a two-edged MasterCard. We have to pay more, but then Texas, oil capital of Texas, gets more out of the boom than say, Vermont, no matter what our business is. As the late Glenn McCarthy once told me, “Son, we’re ALL in the oil business.” Only he said, “the awl bid-ness.” In addition, south Texas is benefiting from something new in the industry called fracking. I’m not sure what this means, but I understand it’s been banned at Baylor.
None of this Texas togetherness eases the shock as I fill up my car’s gas tank because, no, I’m not in the oil business except as a customer, which is why I feel like my pocket is being picked. So I have come up with several ways to cut down on my gas bill. (Incidentally, by “gas” I am referring to gasoline, not to the nauseous fumes mixed with chopped celery which power those effete brie-and-wine environmentally correct cars that look like a Munchkin’s phone booth.)
Here are my tips: I always try to drive downhill, usually that’s south, possibly with a strong wind to my back. Being towed is always a help. I keep my car’s weight to a minimum, starting by cleaning out my trunk. Take out my bowling ball collection, any old Mafia snitches, sacks of slugs for the toll roads and that anvil I never got around to converting into a lamp for the den. They call that round thing a “spare” for a reason: I don’t need it. Keep my own weight to a minimum, too, especially if my seat belt is tighter than Boris Yeltsin at a vodka tasting. Look for other items to pitch. Do I really need a backseat? Anchors were invented before brakes.
Look for the cheapest gas. I found the lowest prices at a Shamrock station in Marfa. Don’t worry, it was down hill. My wife and I both drive Lexuses (Lexi? Lexxus? Lex Luthor?) which have the gas mileage equivalent to that of an M1 Abrams tank and slightly better than those Hummers the size of a ZIP code. Instead of miles to the gallon, it’s more like gallons to the mile. My other solutions are to drive less, bundle my errands, and car pool. This means completing my Christmas shopping by August, taking in my dry cleaning annually and car pooling with people who are not going where I need to go. This last step requires a lot of follow-up cab rides, but really cuts down on my own driving.
It is a known fact that gas expands in heat and contracts in cold, so you get more gas when you pump at lower temperatures. I only buy gas in January. Another step towards handling the high price of gas is the reverse of NIMBY – Not In My Back Yard. I favor PIMBY. Please In My Back Yard. I’m trying to have an oil well or two next to the pink flamingoes by the coyote traps. Ah, that grinding and drilling all night, the distinct aroma of sweat, blood, beer and thick crude. I agree with Newt Gingrich, as I usually do: Drill, Baby, Drill! We didn’t hear that a lot after the BP oil spill turned a large chunk of the Gulf of Mexico into a black ooze of life-killing puke. But we all have short memories. Besides, those Cajuns like monetary paybacks the same as the rest of us.
Then we have the Keystone XL pipeline. Build that sucker through my neighborhood, Running Rats Acres, and send me a check. OK, the line would have to be diverted about 450 miles, but that is cheaper than lawsuits from tree-huggers who don’t like a little 50-foot-deep slit trench in their street with the ever-so-rare spill.
Incidentally, while pumping, I note that one of the great inventions, right up there with unsliced bread and the TV remote, is the little string that attaches the gas tank top to the vehicle. It’s so simple, but how many times have you found yourself sliding under your Peterbilt to fetch a runaway gas tank top? Usually in the rain at night.
We must now consider our oil companies, which employ five out of every three Texans. (See “Glenn McCarthy” above) Despite their billion-dollar subsidies and tax breaks from a generous American public, Big Oil seems to be barely getting by: Irving-based ExxonMobil’s annual revenues of more than $400 billion are about the same as the GDP of Norway. Honest. The company made $41.1 billion in profits last year. Although that was 35 percent more profits than it made in 2010, when the company paid only 17.6 percent taxes — lower than the average American – its tax rate actually dropped. A Reuters analysis estimates that Exxon paid only 13 percent in effective taxes for 2011. Exxon paid zero taxes to the federal government in 2009. Did you?
We can blame OPEC. (Arabs and white males are the only safe targets these days.) Its founding members included such Mideast monsters as Venezuela, Ecuador, Gabon and Indonesia at the initiative of that sneaky Muslim, Venezuelan Energy and Mines minister Juan Pablo Perez Alfonzo. Speculators are also blamed for part of the price increase. And we have taxes. The U.S. federal excise tax on gasoline is 18.4 cents per gallon and 24.4 cents per gallon for diesel fuel. Here in Texas we pay an additional state tax of 20 cents on both gas and diesel. Meanwhile, I’m waiting for PIMBY, then the price of gas will not be near high enough.

Ashby is gassed at ashby2@comcast.net

Xochitl Chorba is the new Billboard Bride

Laurette Veres — Thu, 03 May 2012 16:00:32 +0000

All that glitters

Xochitl Chorba glistens at Bridal Extravaganza’s Billboard Bride photo shoot. You will see her picture on billboards all over town this summer.

Photography by Loyd’s Photography

Xochitl(pronounced Zochi) and her boyfriend, DJ Safady, were at the Civil War exhibit at the Museum of Natural Science, one of her favorite places since she was a child. They were with another couple admiring a gemstones exhibit when she noticed a display case featuring a small box with a ring inside. She was mortified when DJ started wriggling the case, fearing security would kick them out for touching the exhibit. Moments later, she realized the ring was for her! Her friends were taking pictures and DJ was on one knee. At that moment, she began planning an October wedding began.

Part of the planning involved attending the Bridal Extravaganza Show. She applied for, and was selected as the next bride to appear on billboards. “I couldn’t believe it when I got the call,” she recalls.

Loyd’s Photography and Video hosted a day-long photo shoot and captured the perfect photo. Visiting their office is like playing on a movie set. Vignettes surround the country property and provide backdrops for a variety of photos.

Three gowns from Ventura’s Bridal were selected for the shoot. Beading can’t be ignored. Two of the gowns feature beaded tops, and the third gown, the mermaid gown, is head to toe crystals. “We’ve got to have the element of bling,” says Jessica Bennett, bridal consultant.

The Bridal Extravaganza Show tapped The Bloom Room to design bouquets for the summer billboards. Kya Heinen, owner and designer created three unique bouquets for this occasion. “Dark purples are still hot,” she says. So are non-traditional colors like platinum and pewter. Kya is noting a return to simplicity and a tendency towards the vintage look.

The team at Thalio Beckham Make up Artistry was on hand to make Xochitl look and feel beautiful. Her skin was airbrushed to flawless perfection and her eyes had a particularly dramatic focus.

“Seeing my picture on the billboards should give hope to other Houston brides,” she says. “I wasn’t one of those girls who was planning my wedding my entire life,” she says. “And still I had my fairy tale. When I look at the billboards, I’ll say. I did that. It was fun.”

Get this look:

THE 10 PERCENT SOLUTION

Lynn Ashby — Tue, 01 May 2012 03:16:33 +0000

AUSTIN – We are here to check on The University of Texas at Austin. Why? Because the U.S. Supreme Court is doing the same thing. Again. For 20 years the Forty Acres has been in a contest with the courts over its admissions policies, i.e., can race be part of the mix in determining who is allowed to enroll here and spend four years, at least, drinking beer, attending football games and lording it over lesser beings.

Just when we thought it had all been settled and we could stop paying lawyers, along comes Abigail Fisher, an applicant denied admission in 2008 who said she was discriminated against because of her race — she’s white. She charged that some minorities with worse grades got in.

As we all know, UT has a plan whereby any Texas student who finishes in the top 10 percent of his or her graduating high school class is automatically admitted. This opens the door for minorities who have mediocre SATs because they attended mediocre schools. Good, but it is also blatantly unfair to all sorts of brilliant, beautiful and fun-loving high school grads who finish in the bottom 10 percent, like me.

These goodie two-shoes have pretty well taken over the 50,000-plus enrollment, making up an astounding three-quarters of the in-state students. To select the remaining quarter, which the U.S. Supreme Court will consider, the school uses a “holistic review” including test scores, essays, activities, socioeconomic status, cultural background — and race and ethnicity.

As a result of all this mixing of stats and opinions (does the activity of curling count as much as stalking?), this year’s freshman class of 7,000 students is 46 percent white, 23 percent Hispanic, 20 percent Asian and 6 percent black with 5 percent “other.” This is no more a true reflection of Texas youth than the Longhorns’ Young Republicans or their basketball team. These figures are further skewered by UT’s policy allowing illegal immigrants, under certain conditions, to pay in-state tuition. Every seat in every classroom they fill means that the legal child of some Texan couldn’t get in.

It was Houston Chronicle columnist Richard Justice who once observed, “Texas is divided into two kinds of people – those who went to UT and those who wish they had.” A main reason so many Texas high school grads want to go to UT is not the distinguished profs (who are unknown because they never teach) and/or fellow students. It’s the UT panache, the reputation, the parties on East Sixth Street. College Magazine named UT the nation’s Number One school for sex. But the school dropped from first (2010) to fifth place (2011) as the best party school in America, as judged by Playboy. No doubt parents found this exhilarating as they sold their left kidneys to pay tuition.

Another attraction is that Longhorn High is a Tier 1 university which means whatever someone wants it to mean. For example, the University of Houston desperately wants to join UT, A&M and Rice as a Tier 1 school, and recently the Carnegie Foundation for the Advancement of Teaching said UH had been categorized as a research university with “very high research activity,” which the Cougars claim is the equivalent of Tier 1 status. No other ranking agency has followed, but UH is telling everyone it’s now with the big boys.

We have lots of state schools. They just don’t have the attraction of UT. So at each one we build a 106,000-seat stadium, pay the head football coach $6 million a year, land a presidential library or two and by all means add an East Sixth Street. Then UT-Brownsville or Texas A&M-Commerce has the same attraction as the Forty Acres, and the our high school grads will be fighting to get into those schools.

For the youngsters who still want to go to Austin to school, but can’t get in, I present the Wyoming Syndrome: pandering to the school’s hell-bent rush to be “diversified.” That is the buzz word in academe these days. They never use code terms like “quotas,” “level playing field” and “making up for past sins.” No, the secret password is “diversity.” Every school likes to say it has a diverse student body. “We have students from all 254 Texas counties, all 50 states, 187 countries and Mars, and 49 ethnic groups,” they say in their brochures which contain photos of diverse faces that look like the U.N. Security Council.

There is always one photograph of a concerned full professor giving one‑on‑one attention to a freshman. Notice that it is the same professor in every single brochure -‑ he’s an inflatable figure with a clip‑on beard and is about as close as a freshman will ever get to a concerned full professor.

When applying to UT, put down that you are from Wyoming, the state with the smallest population and no doubt the fewest students going out of state. If that seems a stretch, make your hometown Mentone in Loving County, Texas. It is the least populated county in the nation (82), and the chance of any student making it to Austin is minimal. You are a Serbian-Taiwanese with a Tibetan grandmother and speak Navaho. In one fell swoop you plug in several vacancies the Dean of Admissions has been seeking.

Religion is another source for entry. Universities like to boast of every possible religion to show the school isn’t prejudiced. On the other hand, Notre Dame quarterbacks still call their signals in Latin to draw Protestants offside. Oh, that reminds me. Forget all these tips if you can dribble or punt. If only Abigail Fisher could have performed a decent slam dunk we wouldn’t be having this discussion.

Finally, “The” is part of the school’s name, but there is no sane reason to add “Austin.” Everyone knows where it is. But UT is best known as The University, and justifiably so. Only now we can call it The Diversity of Texas at Cheyenne.

Ashby hooks ‘em at ashby2@comcast.net

Roatan

Laurette Veres — Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:10:54 +0000

Off the radar, this Honduran island is home to hidden beaches, superb diving and one of the most pristine reefs in the world.

United Airlines offers direct flights and the dollar still buys a lot in these parts. The primary tourism area, the West End, has a host of restaurants, hotels and shops. Aquarium-clear waters, dolphin encounters, world-class diving and glass bottom boats make this Honduran gem a must see.

5th Annual Run for The Roses Kentucky Derby Party honoring Holly Harwood Skolkin and benefitting the Holly Rose Ribbon Foundation

Laurette Veres — Wed, 25 Apr 2012 19:28:09 +0000

www.roseribbon.org

Mo’s …A Place for Steaks and Momentum Volvo present the 5th Annual “Run for The Roses” Kentucky Derby Party honoring Holly Harwood Skolkin and benefitting the Holly Rose Ribbon Foundation

On Saturday, May 5^th, 2012 restaurant owner, Johnny Vasallo, owner of Mo’s…A Place for Steaks, located in Houston, TX will host the 5^th Annual Run for the Roses Kentucky Derby Party honoring Holly Harwood Skolkin and Benefitting The Holly Rose Ribbon Foundation.

The Kentucky Derby themed event, chaired by Chyra Blackaller and Lori Lemon-Geshay is poised to be the largest event to date for Mo’s, with such noteworthy sponsors as Momentum Volvo, Lexis Florist and Festari for Men. The afternoon event is destined to be the most fashionable, for both men and women. So grab your seersucker, linen suits and your grandest hat as this “Greatest 2 Minutes in Sports” event will feature complimentary mint julep’s, derby-tini’s (pink martini), Mo’s quesadillas, Carolyn Farb guacamole with wonton chips, and assorted sushi, along with betting, a hat contest, and a silent auction of items ranging from diamond rings, sports memorabilia, clothing, spa services, weekend getaways and so much more! Ticket Information: Advance Ticket Purchases: $40.00 each | Day of the Event: $50.00 each. To learn more about the event and to purchase tickets, please visit www.roseribbon.org or contact Autumn Ayers at (713) 622-3610.

Since its inception in Houston, Texas, in 2005, the Rose Ribbon Foundation, in collaboration with Cindi Rose, Dr. Franklin Rose and Tony Rotondo, CEO of the First Street Surgical Center, has helped breast cancer survivors, including women, men and children receive free reconstructive surgery. Its mission is to improve the emotional health of those with critical illness by providing free reconstruction, to both uninsured and under-insured individuals, of all ages and both sexes. Yearly, twelve to fifteen people receive free breast reconstruction from the Holly Rose Ribbon Foundation. All the money donated goes directly to the patients, including their total hospital cost, all nurses, medicines and other doctors. Recently, the foundation has included non- human hair wigs, comfortable robes, pillows, permanent eyebrows and psychological support to those with critical sickness.
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Glen Ellen

Laurette Veres — Mon, 23 Apr 2012 15:10:11 +0000

Just north of San Francisco, in the heart of Sonoma’s Valley of the Moon, the sleepy town of Glen Ellen is the perfect wine country escape.

Many wineries are close by, including Cline Cellars whose stunning grounds are the perfect place to get lost for an afternoon. For dinner, the Glen Ellen Inn Oyster Grill & Martini Bar serves California-fusion food in a romantic setting. After a day of tasting, you’ll be familiar with many of the names on the extensive wine list. Glen Ellen is what Napa and Sonoma used to be before the word got out: peaceful and undiscovered.

GRANDSTANDING

Lynn Ashby — Tue, 17 Apr 2012 01:27:34 +0000

Houston has a pro soccer team, the Dynamo, which has a new stadium, and, no matter where you live in Texas, it may be costing you money. The new Dynamo owners are paying $60 million of the $100 million total. Texas Southern University, which will use the stadium for football, is contributing an estimated $1-2 million. The rest is being paid by the city and county.

This sports facility comes after Houston built stadiums for the NFL Texans and the Astros, plus an arena for the Rockets and Aeros (hockey). It’s hard to get a grasp on the actual cost of these playpens for the billionaire owners. There is the infrastructure such as city streets, curbs, waters and waste, taxes diverted, bonds sold, and on and on. In addition, the Astrodome cost $35 million in 1965 or $244 million in 2012 dollars. But it still carries as much as $32 million in debt for improvements — nearly as much as the original cost of construction – to keep the Oilers from leaving. Hahah.

The Dallas Cowboys built a stadium in Irving with a unique design: a giant doughnut. The fans were covered but the field was open so, as the story goes, God could watch his team. It speaks volumes to know that the design was never copied by any other city anywhere. So owner Jerry Jones wanted a new stadium and got it: Originally estimated to cost $650 million, the stadium cost $1.15 billion,^[ making it one of the most expensive sports venues ever built.

To aid Jones in paying the construction costs of the new stadium, Arlington voters approved an increase of the city’s sales tax by 0.5 percent, the hotel occupancy tax by 2 percent, and car rental tax by 5 percent. The City of Arlington provided over $325 million (including interest) in bonds as funding, and Jones covered any cost overruns. Also, the NFL provided the Cowboys with an additional $150 million loan, as per their policy for helping the financing for the construction of new stadiums. Then there is San Antonio, which built that ghastly Alamodome in hopes of landing an NFL franchise. No luck. On the other hand, look at Los Angeles, the second largest city in the nation, with no NFL team because its priorities are not pro sports. LA seems to be doing just fine.

All these facilities were sold to the taxpayers as an investment in future earnings with sales taxes, hotels, etc. But that is unsportsmanlike conduct, according to scholarly studies. For example, Dennis Coates, PhD. economics, University of Maryland-Baltimore County and president of the North American Association of Sports Economists Impact, determined, “the presence of franchises in multiple sports, the arrival or departure of teams, and stadium construction — in a given area reduced per capita personal income by about $10. In other words, every man, woman, and child in the metropolitan area was poorer by $10 as a result of the sports environment.” Sports facilities now typically cost – COST — the host city more than $10 million a year.

Professional sports teams are very small businesses, comparable to large department or grocery stores. One study found that the overall economic addition an NFL team injects into a city is about the same as a Wal-Mart store. What’s more, the entertainment dollar is only so big. Money spent on the Cowboys or Rockets is money not spent on movies, restaurants, roller rinks. Think of it more like a pizza pie. When one slice is cut larger, all the other slices get smaller. The pie doesn’t grow.

Here’s something else to consider: Roger Noll and Andrew Zimbalist’s study, “Sports, Jobs, and Taxes: The Economic Impact of Sports Teams and Stadiums,” found: “Most professional athletes do not live where they play, so their income is not spent locally. Moreover, players make inflated salaries for only a few years, so they have high savings, which they invest in national firms. Though a new stadium increases attendance, ticket revenues are shared in both baseball and football, so that part of the revenue gain goes to other cities. Similarly, most tax collections inside a stadium are substitutes: as other entertainment businesses decline, tax collections from them fall. On balance, these factors are largely offsetting, leaving little or no net local export gain to a community.” This includes state taxes not paid.

Why would a strapped community put scarce public funds into an essentially private company which reaps the benefits? Because there is a hard-driving owner who threatens to take his franchise elsewhere. Indeed, by their very nature, owners of pro sports franchises are rich egomaniacs. In “North Dallas Forty, or maybe “Semi-Tough,” the owner of a Dallas football team shows an organizational tree of his various companies – oil, cattle, computers. “But this,” he says, pointing to the icon of his pro football team, “got me on the cover of Time.”

It’s the same with colleges. Before an Oklahoma State football game, T. Boone Pickens is being interviewed by a reporter on the field. “Mr. Pickens, why didn’t you give forty million to the English Department instead?” Said Pickens without missing a beat, “Because you wouldn’t be interviewing me now if I’d given forty million to the English Department.”

Don’t forget our high schools: “’Look, football has always been a big deal here. This is Texas.’ – Steve ‘Bubba’ Williams, athletic director at Allen High School, overlooking his new $60-million football stadium. But seating 18,000 with double-decked press boxes and huge video screen, Allen’s facility will still be only the fifth largest high school football stadium in Texas.” – The New York Times

Finally, in 1950 when Rice Stadium was being built by Brown & Root, there were rumors that construction was behind schedule. A reporter went out to the site and found CEO George Brown himself shoveling dirt. The reporter inquired, “Mr. Brown, do you really think this place is going to be ready on time?”

Said George Brown, without looking up, “It’s a night game.”

Ashby is subsidized at ashby2@comcast.net

Waikiki

Laurette Veres — Mon, 16 Apr 2012 15:10:27 +0000

From surf lessons to haute cuisine, you and your sweetie will have a ball unwinding in Waikiki.

Overlooking both Diamond Head and Koko Head craters, the Kahala Hotel and Resort was a favorite of Conrad Hilton when it opened in 1964. The secluded sandy beaches and spacious rooms are famous with the Hollywood set. Photos of Frank Sinatra, John Wayne and many more adorn the walls. When H Texas Weddings visited, we spotted James Gandolfini from “ The Sopranos” and Deborah Lin saying “I Do.”

SO SIOUX ME

Lynn Ashby — Tue, 10 Apr 2012 03:52:48 +0000

We must now consider North Dakota University – and why we should care. The school, way up there on the tundra, for many years has fielded athletic teams called the Fighting Sioux. But in this era of political correctness, the name is deemed insulting and demeaning to fighters. No, actually, insulting to Sioux. The NCAA ruled several years ago the university must change its name to something more suitable for delicate minds or NDU cannot host or participate in NCAA postseason games as the Fighting Sioux. What’s more, other schools are refusing to play in Grand Forks and NDU’s attempt to join a bigger and better athletic conference may be in peril.

Well, them’s Fighting (Sioux) words. Besides, the campus is covered with Sioux stuff. The lobby of the school’s Ralph Engelstad Arena has a huge Indian head logo in the marble floor. The gift shop is – what else? — the Sioux Shop where more than 90 percent of the merchandise features the logo or the nickname. The head of an Indian warrior wearing feathers is everywhere in the stadium — on team jerseys, etched on the aisles, on walls, in locker rooms.

There was a North Dakota state law requiring the university to keep the nickname, but it was repealed. Then the repeal was repealed. The battle has dragged on for seven long years, even involving the North Dakota Supreme Court. The last round was a referendum: Organizers presented more than 17,000 signatures on a petition calling for a statewide vote, which will be held in June. Keeps them busy. If you’ve seen the movie “Fargo” you know that, aside from tossing people into wood chippers, not a lot happens in North Dakota. But to make the change again won’t be cheap: $750,000 was spent on the original transition.

This fight is only the latest chapter in the Politically Correct, or PC, movement to do away with traditions. UT-Arlington used to be the Rebels. Indeed, a lot of Southern schools once called themselves Rebels. Not any more. As far as I know, there is no groundswell to change the New York Yankees to the Emancipators. The Stanford Indians became the Cardinal. Marquette University changed its team name from the Warriors to the Golden Eagles.

Somehow the Florida State Seminoles have avoided the change. Some say it’s because the actual Seminoles in Florida like the name. Others note Florida State wins national titles and generates big bucks for everyone, including the NCAA, unlike North Dakota. That’s cynical, and probably true. The University of Utah still calls itself the Utes, which beats their first choice: the Multi-Married Mormons.

Here’s a good one: The University of Oklahoma once had an Indian mascot, Little Red, who at OU football games would dress in red and white war paint and feathered bonnet (school colors). When OU would score a touchdown the band’s drummers would beat a tom-tom rhythm and Little Red would dance around, waving his tomahawk and yelling war chants. This was eventually deemed in poor taste and humiliating to our noble savages, so the job was abolished. Unfortunately, the slot was reserved for full-bloodied Indians, and included a total scholarship at OU. “Don’t do me any more favors, round eyes, as long as the rivers shall run and the buffalo shall roam.” It’s a good story, but I can’t confirm it.

The Florida State situation highlights some confusion in this policy. Since the NCAA says schools can keep their names if it’s OK with the Indians, and the Seminoles like the idea, why can’t NDU? Because the Spirit Lake Tribe voted to allow the use of the Fighting Sioux, but the Standing Rock Sioux tribal council opposes the nickname. Incidentally, the pros don’t seem to be changing at all: the Washington Redskins, Kansas City Chiefs, Atlanta Braves and Cleveland Indians.

It seems most Indian activists oppose the use of Indian names, but the rank and file don’t care. According to a Sports Illustrated survey in 2002, “There is a near total disconnect between Indian activists and the Native American population on this issue.” Indeed, there is even a fight over what to call whom. The title “Indian” is being replaced by “Native American” among activists. But the federal agency which oversees the Native American affairs is called the Bureau of Indian – yes, Indian – Affairs, and is headed by Larry EchoHawk. Go figure.

According to the American Indian Cultural Support, as of 2006, at least 2,498 kindergarten, elementary, middle and high schools used Indian mascots, so there is a lot of work to be done with school names. But the facelift doesn’t end on campus. The word “squaw” has disappeared from the names of all public places in Maine – about six of them. The erasure came 11 years after a state law required the change, but it took till now for the U.S. Board on Geographic Names to approve the move. Most Indians in Maine say “squaw” is offensive and translates to prostitute. The law doesn’t cover the privately owned Big Squaw Mountain Resort, and the owner said he is not changing the name. Of course, Squaw Valley, Calif., was the scene of the 1960 Winter Olympics and no one seemed to mind, not even India.

Here in Texas, there was a road just west of Port Arthur called Jap Road because years ago a Japanese rice farmer lived nearby. I think they changed the name because no Toyota dealership would set up shop there. As for the battle of the North Dakota teams’ title, note the name in dispute is the Fighting Sioux, not the Fightin’, a spelling which is so popular among college organizations. I’m going to buy the Fightin’ Texas Aggie Band a “g.” Also, is the disturbing part of the name Fighting or Sioux? Maybe the Mincing Sioux or the Fighting Sue would past muster. Finally, we must expect at future North Dakota games, ticket scalpers will be called “entry adjusters.”

Ashby is PC at ashby2@comcast.net